SEVEN FOR YOU â—½ TIPS
Shadow Lifters
Our Panel of Women
Holidays are busy, and sometimes the joy of the season is overshadowed by a number of things. Maybe it’s sadness, or the weariness of the world, or even just the stress of it all. And before we know it, the holidays are over and we missed out on what all we intended to slow down and enjoy! We asked our panel of women to share what they do to lift these shadows, so that they actually enjoy the moments:
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The holidays can be stressful with everything seeming darker than normal in the news these days, so I try to find ways to give. Christmas is about family, love, sharing, kindness, and giving back....it is not about the perfectly wrapped gift. I used to be stressed when I had little money to buy gifts. But there are other ways to celebrate His birth and the lessons he taught us. "Love one another as I have loved you." This message should be remembered all year.
This year, I am gathering food items to take to a food bank for those in need. This brings me joy. - Cathy
For me, Christmas and the celebration of the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ, has always been one of joy and love, but also one of complete exhaustion. We have many birthdays (including mine) in December as well. What lifts my spirit during this beautiful season is to have a lot of candles throughout the house on timers so nighttime glows with warmth. This light at night lifts my tired heart and reminds me of the Light of the World who was born to save the world. So this year, I will slow down more and bask in the candlelight while remembering why we celebrate Christmas and thank Him for all He has done for me and my family. – Glenna
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For me, Christmas is so fun, but with my active mind I often anticipate it being over before it ever arrives! I don't know what that is called, but that kind of thought process can certainly cast a shadow over the present joy of the season. I struggle with living in the moment.
Practically, I try to have a few things on the calendar in January to look forward to...when Christmas is over. This includes my husband's birthday celebration. But also, I really try to savor the moments throughout the season, like taking time to sip hot tea, observing the trees out the window, taking slow walks, and experiencing advent reading nightly. This year, we have the book Darkness Then Light, and I'm looking forward to that. Intentional slow moments where I contemplate His goodness helps me savor the moments instead of rushing through them. - Marcy
For many years, Mrs. Clause was the sole Christmas magic maker in the Mercer household. The Elves were little, and Mr. Clause thought Mrs. Clause enjoyed doing it all herself!
Three years ago, Mrs. Clause decided to voice her opinion in an unhealthy way by going on a Christmas-magic STRIKE. She just up and quit!
Mr. Clause and all the little Elves, who were, in fact, not so little anymore, suffered from shock, but then jumped into action! They had a Christmas-magic meeting and came up with a plan.
The new plan: Everyone chips in money according to their own budget, and then we split the pot evenly. We draw names. Each person is responsible for spending the money on the person they draw, plus one gift for each of the other people. They are responsible for the person’s stocking, as well as wrapping their gifts. (Mrs. Clause *particularly* disdained the wrapping responsibilities.)
Now, Mrs. Clause is responsible for a fair portion of Christmas-magic! Mr. Clause and the Elves have decided they enjoy co-creating Christmas magic! Mrs. Clause is mostly full of Christmas magic again. She has one boundary left to set: decorating! She has decided that she will only decorate to the extent that it makes HER happy, not others happy. Life is a journey….Mrs. Clause is still learning how to live life to the fullest and be a healthy family member! – Laura
January and February are crazier than December in our family because we have five big birthdays in those two months. So, I’m always trying to think of gifts for that along with Christmas. I will say that a lot of the time, the after Christmas sales, when looking for birthday gifts, can lift my spirits. Or maybe it’s just shopping and finding those gifts that gives me a feeling of accomplishment.
Another “shadow lifter,” as an older woman, includes reminiscing about the times my children were still at home. And I love looking at old photos. A few Christmases ago one of my son’s and his wife gave me and my husband a PhotoShare Frame. It’s a digital frame that displays your photos. It’s easy to program photos from your phone and I have mine set on a slideshow. I have old pictures of our family before grandchildren and plenty of photos with the grandchildren. Sometimes, I just have to stop and look at the picture shown and think back. It always puts a smile on my face. – Carole
I don’t really feel exhausted during the season. I did years ago when I was working, but now in retirement the holidays seem doable for me. I don’t feel sadness that I can remember. There is always some level of grief over the present issues of this age, but it’s not better or worse at Christmas that I can think of. I’m working on trying to live in the moment. While I do try to plan what I hope are some special moments, I have given up on the self-imposed expectation that it is my job to make Christmas magical for everyone. Whatever I do attempt, I want it to honor Christ. And I do hope to get to enjoy some of the special moments through the eyes of the children. I guess my goal is to plan well, execute well, and be as relaxed as possible during the process. - Shelley
As the saying goes, “Christmas is a Magical Time of the Year.” But as most of us know, it can also be a time of stress, feeling blue, and being very overwhelmed. It is so important to incorporate some shadow lifters into the Holiday Season.
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In my younger day, I decorated to the hilt! Both inside and outside. I had over 40 holiday tablecloths, and 30 boxes of decorations. I love, love, love Christmas!
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Now, life and the Holiday Season is more serene for me, but I still love all-things Christmas, I just rely more on outside sources to fulfill my festive cheer. We attend community holiday events. The hospital has a Festival of Trees where I can see beautiful, ornate trees. We attend local church’s Christmas sing-alongs and cantatas, and live nativity scenes. [note that most of these are free-of-charge, if you’re on a budget.]
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I needed to decide what was most important to make Christmastime an enjoyable, yet relaxing time in my home. I realized that I needed to give up on some traditions: having a full-size tree and lots of decorations throughout the house, baking goodies non-stop during December, buying gifts for out-of-area extended family.
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The traditions that I keep that are truly shadow lifters during the holiday season for me:
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Christmas lights. I hang several strings around my home – both color & white lights. There’s just something soothing about sitting in a room with just Christmas lights on.
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Christmas music. I start playing Christmas music the day after Thanksgiving. I listen to all types; traditional (think Bing Crosby’s I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas), classical, Christmas hymns, and yes, even Elvis Presley!
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Christmas movies. I confess; I’m not a Hallmark movies devotee, but I do like to watch some feel-good, warm fuzzy, Christmas movies during the holidays. Including the classics, made-for-TV, and . . . yes, Die Hard! (contrary to my husband, it IS a Christmas movie!!)
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Christmas devotional. Every year, I get a devotional book geared towards the Christmas season. Last year, I read The Marvel and Miracle of Advent by Lisa Harper and Christine Caine. It centers me in remembering the true meaning of the season.
Merry Christmas! - Gloria