Miscarriage isn’t something people generally like to talk about. Many couples face it alone, suffering silently while no one else has any idea of their pain. It’s a tough subject, but I don’t think there should be any shame in bringing it out into the open. We are meant to help carry one another’s burdens, and sometimes healing comes through sharing our pain.


I never knew that one in four pregnancies ends in miscarriage, until I became one of those statistics myself. When my daughter was a year and a half old, I lost my second child at seven weeks. Add onto that a somewhat traumatic emergency room experience, and my husband and I were both pretty shaken up and exhausted. To sum it up, we were devastated, as anybody would be. But we recognized that there are two reactions to trials – to become angry and distant from God, or to draw near to Him and trust. We both agreed on the second option; we chose to praise God in the storm.


Making that choice did not magically take away our pain, nor did it suddenly erase our sadness. But it did give us hope, because we knew that God was in control and that we didn’t have to face it alone.  We trusted His plan, even though it hurt, and we knew we could grow through the trial. Let me tell you, it would have been so easy to get mad at God and blame Him for my suffering. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t tempted to do just that. But worship would be meaningless if I only offered it during happy times. So, painful as it was, I decided to believe and actively remind myself that God is good ALL the time, even when life isn’t. 

His plan is perfect, no matter what. In choosing to believe this, although my heart was absolutely broken, I was able to experience joy and hope and peace.


Sometimes God allows things to happen in our lives that don’t make sense and maybe never will. But I believe the words of Romans 8:28.


“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him,

who have been called according to His purpose.”


Sisters, there is purpose in our pain. We may not ever understand it here on earth, but our job is to trust, not understand. Whatever you are facing today, remember that God is bigger. Have faith that Jesus can calm the storm and, until He does, cling to Him and dwell on His goodness. You are never alone. He is with you through it all, and He knows how much it hurts. Give it to Him and believe that He can turn your mourning into joy. He can make beauty from ashes, but His timing is not always the same as ours. Wait on Him and know that He loves you and has a plan for you.


I am still in awe of His love for me, and so very grateful for the rainbow to our storm. Less than a year after our miscarriage, we were blessed with a happy, healthy baby boy (who is now an energetic toddler). I still don’t know why things happened the way they did, but I can see the fingerprints of God all over our story. And I promise that they are all over yours too.

Purpose in Pain
by Kaelin Scott

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