Where do I even begin?


A lot has changed in such a short amount of time, not only in the world around me, but in my personal life. More to come on that a little later, but we cannot forget that last month the world was shaken from its normal everyday living when COVID-19 began to spread across it like wildfire. There was so much information about it and I couldn’t look away. I know I spent way too much time scrolling, reading articles, and watching videos. There was new information popping up every minute, it seemed. I would like to say that the only reason I spent so much time on my phone was because I didn’t want to miss anything important, while that is true the other truth was, I just didn’t have any self-control. I had to seek forgiveness.

I thought I would share a (my) little quarantine questionnaire:

  • Did I feel guilty for getting sucked into the barrage of news and focusing on what everyone else was doing instead of living in the moment? Yes.

  • Should I have looked to God for more information and wisdom about all this instead of what the world was saying? Yes.

  • Did God condemn me for not keeping my focus solely on Him and not just during this time, but in times past? No, He did not and does not bring condemnation, but He is always slowly convicting me to turn my attention on Him.

  • Did I allow a little bit of fear to creep in (mainly fear for others and all the negative ramifications that this will have on a lot of people for many years to come)? Yes.

  • Did I pray about all this? Yes, and God’s peace came.

  • Did I think almost on a daily basis, “It seems like we are living in some kind of Sci-Fi movie and no one can predict the ending?” Yes.

  • Did I use all my extra quarantine time wisely? No.

  • Did I give myself some grace? It was a struggle at first, but yes.

  • Did I organize something in my house? Yes, my closet.

  • Did I feel motivated every day during this quarantine to accomplish something? No.

  • Did I stay in my pajamas and not brush my hair for at least 3 out of the 7 days of the week? Yes.

  • Did I stick to my commitment of taking a little run every day? No, I had to tell myself it is okay to rest.

  • Do I feel thankful that I am still getting paid during my school shut down? Yes, 100%. God always provides.

  • Do I miss my job and students? Maybe, not so much the job aspect, but I do miss my students, yes.

  • Did I learn how to use Zoom? For the most part, yes, and I have been a part of two Zoom prayer meetings with several amazing women of God so far.

  • Did I start reading any book(s)? Yes, a book series called the Chronicles of Narnia by the beloved author C.S. Lewis. If you haven’t read them, you should.

  • Did I love all the creativity coming from everyone being cooped up with their families for weeks on end? Yes.

  • Am I going to stop this questionnaire anytime soon? Yes.

  • Last but not least, am I thankful that God is in control? YES, God is a good, good father no matter what.


All that to say, this introvert in quarantine is doing good even with all the changes going on in my personal life as well that I had alluded to early.

The weekend before everything started to change due to the novel corona virus sweeping across the world, my sister got a call from my dad letting us know that they were moving back. (Insert a look of shock on my face.) If you have not been following this article for about 10 months or so, then here is a real quick back story.

Last summer my parents got involved with a foster agency in Brenham, which is about two hours away. They committed to being foster parents there for one year. I was skeptical at first, but since they fell led by God to do this I supported them and trusted God to take care of them and us as well.

I cannot go into too much detail about why my parents were unable to finish their one year commitment, but let’s just say it had to do with not only their safety but for the safety of one of their foster daughters and her 2 year old daughter.

The weekend before the shelter-in-place order went into effect, on that Tuesday in March, my parents along with their foster daughter and her daughter that I just mentioned (who they want to remain with them during this transition to another foster agency here in Round Rock), came for an extended visit, but in all reality they were moving back. They had loaded up most of their stuff in a moving truck and put it all into a storage unit down the street.

What I thought was going to be just my sister and I stuck in quarantine together turned out to be much different than what I was expecting. While it was comforting having my parents with us during this time, it was yet another big change happening at the same time other changes were happening. And to be honest, I felt overwhelmed. That feeling soon vanished with the fact that God was answering some of our prayers almost immediately. My dad got his old job back that same week they came back for their extended visit. They found an apartment nearby that they can move into while my dad gets their home (AKA our home currently) foster approved and then my sister and I will simply do a switcheroo with them when that is all finished.

Hopefully by the time you are reading this, we are finishing up our shelter in place orders, but who knows. Only God knows! And that is so comforting because He desires good for me and for us all even in the moments where we do not understand what is going on, even in the midst of storms. He also forgives me when I forget to put my trust in Him.

One last thing… Last month we celebrated Easter. Even though this Easter was different from any other, I never want to forget what Jesus did on the cross for me, for us. He made the ultimate sacrifice by dying on the cross and rising on the 3rd day to defeat death on our behalf. This brings me an everlasting hope. I am so, so thankful that God loves me this much.

Romans 5:8

“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this:

while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

So whatever is going on, I will hold fast to this. I will hold fast to His love. 

Holding Fast
by Bethany Gomez

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