LIFE RIGHT NOW ◽ YOU
There is this song that came on the radio recently that you may have heard, if you listen to your local Christian radio station. It’s called “Evidence” by Josh Baldwin. The song is about recalling the evidence of God’s goodness throughout your whole life and also His goodness, not only in the good times, but the difficult times in your life as well. It also talks about His faithfulness to always walk beside us in every season. It’s such a powerful song and its message is just what I needed to hear.
I need to recall God’s goodness more often. Sometimes I let the bad and negative things in my life drown out all the countless good things which can cause the enemy’s lies to permeate my thoughts. God’s goodness is all around, and if I simply stop for a little bit to think about His goodness in my life even when the storms are raging, then I truly believe peace and joy will be in the midst of them.
One of those particular storms right now is not directly my storm. It’s the storm of someone so close to me that I feel the effects of it ever so much. It’s kind of like being in the cone of uncertainty of a major hurricane. The wind and storm surge may not be as great as the place where the eye makes landfall, but it’s still pretty damaging.
My mom was diagnosed with stage 3 melanoma back in April. Cancer. The most evil of evils. It has always been one of my biggest fears for me, or someone really close to me, getting cancer. My mom gave me permission to share a little bit of her journey and testimony. She has told everyone really close to her because she knows that prayer and support, not pity and sorrow, from those around her will get her through this storm. God has, of course, been in the midst from the very beginning.
My mom has always told us that if ever she were to get cancer that she would not go through chemo or radiation treatments, because she never wanted to live life too sick to function, and she didn’t want our family to go bankrupt trying to pay for these treatments and hospital visits.
The only treatment her doctors recommended she do is something called immuno therapy. It sounds safe enough, but really it is two powerful drugs taken through a port. Essentially, the side effects could be similar to chemo, minus the hair loss. The treatment, we were told, was extremely expensive and my mom didn’t have insurance. So when the cost of 6 treatments was covered, my mom was faced with one of the most difficult decisions of whether or not to do the treatment given the fact that God had made a way financially. However, the side effects could be less than ideal. I tried not to pressure her, but I didn’t want her to “do nothing” because in my mind, doing nothing would result in my worst fears being realized.
She decided to go ahead and start the treatment. We were all hopeful and prayed against any severe side effects. The first treatment went okay. She broke out in a rash that lasted about a week. The second treatment nearly destroyed her. Seeing my mom become seriously sick due this treatment was heart wrenching. She couldn’t eat or drink much of anything for 21 days. She lost so much weight and she became severely dehydrated and ended up in the hospital. She hardly slept and is still not getting a full night’s rest. Her body is not functioning like it should, due to those drugs destroying her immune system trying to find the cancer. I wish she had never started it.
I couldn’t help but ask God,
“Why is this happening? I already trust You to take care of me and those I love.”
But do I, really?
One of the many evidences of God’s goodness through all this is the fact that my sister now has a job that is very flexible and she has been able to be there for my mom physically more than I have. She has taken her to almost all her doctor’s appointments, treatments and overnight ER stays. I wish I was able to help more, but I know that Mom has been in good hands.
Another evidence of God’s goodness is the many good friends supporting my entire family through this. All of them have stepped in to help in some way or another. Some have been praying (which is so vital to getting through this trial), sending money for groceries, bringing over food to my parents, waking up early to go on a walk with me so that I can just talk it all out, and my sister’s boss said, “Do whatever you need to do,” when needing to take my mom to her appointments. Others have been making gift baskets full of comfort items for my mom, sending sweet texts checking on how my mom is doing, and so many more evidences. I know that we would not make it without true friends like these.
And who gives us those friends? God does.
As we are coming up on Thanksgiving, I am ever more thankful to God for giving my family and myself the most wonderful, life-giving friends.
I could continue on with so many more evidences of God’s goodness, but I will leave it here with another reminder from the song “Evidence” to always look for God’s goodness, because it’s all around.
Help me remember when I’m weak
Why should I fear, the evidence is here