PRACTICAL PARENTING ◽ HOME
Indulge and Smile
by Marcy Lytle
I remember as a parent of young children that it was so hard to navigate what they should and should not eat, and especially hard if they were picky eaters. My son only wanted chicken and fries…until he was 20! My daughter ate a lot of different foods. And yet I raised them the same way. I also remember worrying that they would have some sort of deficiency if I didn’t make them make healthy choices when it came to what they put on their plate and digested.
Fast forward a couple decades and more, and I’m happy to say that these two kids are now adults and they are healthy and well, and they sorted out their eating habits! I did my best, but honestly…just maturity and modeling and then marrying and living…helped them with their eating routines.
In today’s culture, there is so much “bad” food – so we’re told – that as parents we can find ourselves panicking about ingredients and we then become overwhelmed with what to buy, what to offer, and what to teach our kids to eat. And we will have friends that seem to do it all perfectly, with making their own nut butters, roasting the vegetables and finding just the right recipes and bars and snacks for packing in their kids’ lunches. We might compare and feel like a failure, because one day we just placed chips and a sandwich on white bread (gasp!) in their lunchbox.
Or…maybe we are the ones with the perfect boxes filled with dried and fresh fruit, and only the best of ingredient snacks and all the things. And we feel rather smug about it when we see other parents and their kids with Cheetos smeared across their faces. We would never…
And then there’s the day when snow cones are nearby. Or an aunt brings our kids a chocolate bear. What about that dessert that’s on the table when friends invite us over? Is it okay to let our kids indulge?
My mom used to say to me – eat all things in moderation – and I think I said it to my kids as well. But I remember what she said and I’ve observed that it seems to work best!
We can rule out all unhealthy foods in our home, but the indulgences will show up at our table or in our world, because we live in a world of indulgences! We can also just let our kids run amuck when it comes to food because it’s too hard to manage. Neither extreme has proved to be very wise, in my observation.
Moderation means that we do our best with healthy offerings to our kids – the fruit, the yogurt, the vegetables and the clean ingredients. But we don’t have to stand in the store and read every can…or our children will suffer. Moderation means that we can have that ice cream in the freezer but we can definitely control the portions and the frequency with which it is eaten. And when we offer our kids moderation instead of never this or never that…we teach them balance. We learn together to enjoy food – all of it – as we learn to observe our own bodies and realize when we are full and how we feel after we eat something in excess.
Kids are going to ask for a snow cone. Let them indulge once in a while, at least in August!
Kids are going to be given chocolate. No, they don’t have to eat it at bedtime, but they can have a few bites after lunch.
Kids are going to play games and be offered a bag of unhealthy snacks like chips and cookies. Open them and eat the snack with them. Just a few of each, perhaps, and not the whole bag.
Kids are going to watch how we eat and enjoy the good stuff, and treat ourselves to sips and bites of the sweet stuff, and they’re going to follow suit.
Kids are going to grow up and go to birthday parties where cake (with icing!) is served, and they’ll want a slice.
There’s nothing better than a snow cone on a hot day. And a piece of fruit might be a good alternative. But why not teach our kids to indulge for pure pleasure, but in moderation, and to enjoy all things bright and beautiful alongside all things healthy and wholesome.
They might just grow up to be perfectly balanced kids as they fill their plates in college, when they leave home without us.