COUSIN MOMS â—½ TIPS
Mom of Three
​
If I’m being honest, date nights – going out – are few and far between. We were in a season for a long while where we really didn’t want to leave the kids, because free nights were few, and we wanted to include them. Date nights are definitely important, but there is also a balance. For us, we do a good job of connecting on a daily basis – at night when the kids are asleep we chat and talk. Other times, we get a random night when kids are at a sports practice or with grandparents. This past season, while the kids were in school, my husband and I had lunch together because we both work at home! I do know that having time with him, dating him, is important. But only “date night” connections every so often is not enough, and we also have a budget, but day-to-day connections work as well.
It’s the day to day connections where we chat and spend time over coffee, or even a ride in the car to pick up the kids, that works for us! Our date nights don’t have to be big or fancy or every week. They can be a simple lunch or a shopping excursion to pick out wood floors for the house!
​
When we do have a designated date night, we often stay in (to save money). We watch a show we enjoy together, and have dinner at home, and make it cozy. If we do go out, it’s a coffee date for sure – and sometimes bowling! Our love language is coffee, and we sometimes play a game. We don’t visit the theater a lot, because we watch enough shows at home. We like to go somewhere that we can talk and do something, or even just walk around!
​
Sometimes we plan our dates nights together, or sometimes we surprise each other – especially on birthdays.
​
So both – date nights out and daily connections – are a great balance for us! I’ve been so grateful for this season. Finding time with toddlers is hard, but now that the kids are in school we have more time. We also love to serve together, and call that connection, because we are super compatible that way!
Simple Things
by Charissa & Kamrin
It’s November, the time to give thanks. And while we can do our best as parents to teach our kiddos to have grateful hearts, it’s sometimes a good practice to consider our own hearts. And while being a mom can bring with it total busyness, it’s so nice to sit and consider a few simple things that’s we’re grateful for, as well, as we raise the kids God has given us. We asked the cousin moms to think of the little things they observe in their children that cause them pause, to stop and give thanks.
Charissa
During the chaos of this busy season with littles, it is easy to get caught up in the frustrations and tiredness of raising kids! As we draw closer to Thanksgiving, it's a good reminder to focus our thoughts on the blessings of what kids bring, and the true GIFT they are from God.
Below are some simple reasons I'm thankful for the kids God has blessed me with... even though raising kids is hard work. The blessings they bring (big and small) are worth it! And the best part - raising kids is KINGDOM work. We are raising the next generation of believers, helping make Heaven crowded.
-
T - "Time" - When I spend uninterrupted time with my kids I am always blessed. Sometimes, I have to just put aside my to-do list & phone, and sit and play. It’s a good reset for me!
-
H - "Honesty" - I love how honest my kids are. At their young ages, they are not afraid to tell the truth and I love their boldness.
-
A - “Active” - I’m thankful my kids like to go & do - sports, going outside, swing, etc. It keeps me active and going!
-
N - “Noise” - This is hard because every day my girls are LOUD - most of the time too loud. They are either singing, running around the house & laughing, arguing, or yelling at the top of their lungs. I have to remind myself what a blessing it is to have this noise because one day, that noise will be gone, my house will be quiet and I’ll wish I had the noise back!
-
K - “Kisses” - A kiss before school or before bed. It’s a little action but it warms my soul.
-
S - “Smile” - Seeing my girls smile brings me joy. Just like a kiss, it’s a small action but seeing joy through a little child is precious. It’s a reminder to find joy wherever we are, and to smile through life even though it can be really hard!
Kamrin
​
As I’m thinking about what I’m grateful for regarding my kids, I recall that the last few -years, we’ve had asthma flare-ups, the flu, strep, allergies, etc., with immune systems not working well. It was hard to see them miss things because of that. But this school year, my kids have stayed healthy and I’m grateful! So that’s a big thing!
​
As far as the little things that mean a lot, however, this is something we even talk about with our kids. They are good about praying about the big things, but teaching them that God is present in the little things, is something we are working on. The little things that we notice strengthen us so that we are then grateful for even the big and hard things!
Regarding my kids,
​
It’s the little moments with my daughter, when we get to talk. She even initiates this! My daughter enjoys using our bathroom at night, instead of the one she shares with the boys. When I’m getting ready too, she talks about her day, or we will plan things. She turns off her music and phone, and we chat. I am grateful for this, and it means a lot to me as a mom.
​
It’s time with my oldest, when he gives me a big hug. He gives me this hug every night before he goes to bed. He knocks on my door so that he doesn’t miss this opportunity, and this means the world to me! He never misses, even when he’s super exhausted!
​
It’s my youngest and his actions that speak so loudly. We get time in the morning car ride, because I sub at this school. We get a lot of time to talk. He talks about his day or what he did at school, when we have this one on one time.
​
These moments are sort of created naturally and I can see that the kids value these things.
​
It’s the chores the kids do, on a daily basis. Sometimes, they forget and aren’t always great at it, but it’s starting to click with our oldest. He is becoming responsible on his own, without us asking. I’m very grateful to see this growth. He offers to help me when Dad is out of town, he notices when I’ve had a rough day, as he’s just aware!
​
It’s the out-to-eat dinners. We can’t eat out all the time, but we try once a week to do so. Our kids do have cell phones with hard rules, but when we go out to eat, our kids put them away and chat with each other and laugh. They engage and are present at the table. I’m so thankful for this family time.
​
Finally, I love that my kids love family, and I’m so grateful that they love family parties, love their cousins, and value time with each other. My youngest sometimes initiates time to cook with me, and I love that, too!
​
So grateful to be their mom…